Dear Harriette: My dad is a great smoker and has the leg as I have memory.
When he grew up, he used to smoke inside the house. I remember that the smell is everywhere, in my clothes, on the walls, only in my toys. I developed some health problems that I think were linked to all that exposure to second -hand smoke, and it is something that I have taken with me adulthood.
I have two young children, 2 and 6 years old, and I am a protector of their health. I have made my dad clear that I don’t want me to smoke with my children.
He does not smoke inside the house when he visits, but whatever we are outside, as in the backyard, in a park or simply walking, illuminates without thinking twice. I have remembered several times, but he eliminates it or says things like: “We are outside, it is fine” or “a breath will not hurt them.”
It is more than frustrating. How can I communicate with him in a way that does not feel like an attack, but it still makes it clear that this is not negotiable for me?
– Stop tuxingo
Want to quit: Now is the time to be direct and firm. Tell his father that if he continues to smoke around his children, he is no longer welcome to come.
Show it data on the negative impact of second -hand smoke on others and say that, no matter how much you love it, you are not willing to submit your children to what you had to endure your whole life.
You are not exaggerating; The negative impacts of second -hand smoke are significant. Think of coronary heart disease, stroke, lung cancer and the effects of the reproductive health of the advertiser in women, as well as sudden child death syndrome, respiratory infections, ear infections and asthma attacks on children. For more information, visit cdc.gov/tobacco/secondhand-smoke/health.html.
Dear Harriette: A close friend will celebrate a birthday in about two months.
We have been friends for almost 15 years, and she has always done her duty to be there, especially for special used cars. We Harp we live in the same city for eight years, so it means that the world for me is always supporting me.
For her birthday this year, she is making a trip to the Caribbean. I can’t join due to financial limitations, but I still want to celebrate it. Do you have any unique and affordable suggestion for a loved one to feel special when it cannot be present with them?
-Crenaments
Dear long -term birthday: Make it a birthday video Tell your most prominent aspects of your friendship and how much you appreciate it. If you know your other friends, invite them to send birthdays and create a compilation that you share with it. Coordinate with someone who goes to the trip to play it during its duration one of the moments of celebration.
If you know where you stay, you can call in advance and make the reception deliver a bottle of champagne or bouquet of flowers that you can enjoy on the trip.
Harriette Cole is one of life and founder of Dreamlepers, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harrietcole.com oc/or Andrews McMeel Syndionction, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
